Marriage (Posted 2-13-2013)

Last month we celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary.  Wow, 9 years.

We recently pulled out our wedding pictures and looked through them.  The difference is clear.  We are not as young as we once were.  We both comment on our gray hairs coming in, and we laugh over our minor health issues that are starting to appear now that we’re in our 30s.  However, we did recently purchase tickets for a museum and the women selling the tickets thought we might be under 25.  Hehe.  I guess we don’t look that old.  It’s the comparison between the wedding photos and what’s in the mirror that really does it for us.

Marriage has been a huge blessing to us.  We are each other’s best friend, and we both count it a privilege to share a toothbrush and all the other things that go along with sharing daily life.  Yet, we’ve also accepted the fact that for us, marriage is not easy.  (I don’t think we’re alone either.)  Marriage, a good marriage, requires a ton of work and ours is no different.

The good news has been that way back in the beginning we committed to working hard on our marriage.  We agreed that if we struggled, we would go to counseling, and we have.  We started our relationship by reading marriage books and talking together about how to apply what we read. We’ve given each other freedom to speak into each other’s lives and as a result, we have had a lot of raw, painful conversations about personal flaws, weaknesses, broken dreams…etc.  We have also experienced life overseas and a lot of personal grief, which really have just added to the challenges and to the depth of our relationship.

These 9 years have been quite a ride.  Really, I think it’s a huge blessing that we like each other at all, and the truth is that our relationship is much, much more than that.

This year around our anniversary, our friends gave us two books: “For Men Only” and “For Women Only.”  Great books.  We highly recommend them.  They were both easy reads, and we each learned some things and were reminded of some things that we had known before but forgotten.  It was also encouraging for me, Julie, to read some of the book “For Men Only” and be reminded that I’m pretty normal and not crazy.  🙂

So, if you’re into working hard on your marriage and you’re up for another book, we’d definitely recommend “For Men Only” and “For Women Only.” May God pour His grace on all of our marriages that we might joyfully grow old together in the midst of the challenges that life throws our way!

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